Heeeey, look who’s a young and fresh 28! Gosh, I didn’t wanna say what I’ve been saying on every one of my birthdays since I turned 25 but I can’t help it… How am I 28??? How!? Like in my mind I really should still be 21. But anyway, yeah I’m a massive year older. A proper, full blown adult “apparently” LOL. Last year when I turned 27 I went through a quarter life slash existential crisis characterized by asking myself “WTF am I doing with my life!?!?!?” repeatedly. This year is very different, I’m feeling a lot more positive, and even happy about turning a year older. So I thought it would be nice to reflect and share what I’ve learned on my 28 trips around the sun.
- Mental health and upkeep is a life essential. We all go through a lot from childhood to adulthood, if you haven’t properly dealt with something traumatic or that affected your life it will likely rear its head at some point in your emotions, behavior and/or relationships. Seeing a therapist every now and again just to offload may be a worthwhile investment to help you navigate any situation that’s causing you anxiety, making you depressed or unhappy. But therapy aside, I think having a consistent spiritual practice is the most accessible and best way to take care of your mind and spirit, I really believe life feels a lot less overwhelming for me when I keep up with my spiritual practice.
- Get financially savvy. I was one of those happy go lucky people who would spend all their money on whatever they wanted because I didn’t believe in “depriving” myself. Huh! It was nice while it lasted but I quickly learned that the sooner you learn financial discipline i.e that foreign concept called delayed gratification, the better off you will be. That means saving a good portion of everything you earn, trying to stay out of unnecessary debt and reducing whatever debt you do have already. Your future self will thank you for it.
- Be kind to yourself. I don’t think most of us realize what unkind things we say to ourselves. Pay attention to the way you speak to yourself and be intentional about affirming and lifting yourself up especially in those moments when things aren’t going as well as you had hoped in any area of your life.
- Resist the urge to compare your life to others’. In the age of social media where we are constantly seeing “other kids” doing big things – buying a home, a new car, getting that fancy schmancy job, flaunting a banging body, being a jetsetter and the list is endless – it can get difficult not to look at your life and think “WTF am I doing wrong here?” But what we often forget is that everyone of us is on a different path. Yes, we may be journeying adjacent to one another but there are no two people in the same lane boo. Focus on your own lane, you will get to where you need to in your own time.
- Not everyone will like you. Come to terms with the truth of who are and get comfortable with the reality that you will not be everybody’s cup of tea. The older I get, the more I realize how silly it is to think that everyone you encounter (even those you never personally meet) will like you. That’s just not how the world works and the sooner you detach from needing to be liked, the sooner you can start to live your best life!
- Don’t be sorry about who you are. From a young age we’re told by our parents, friends and society to adjust or tweak this or that attribute about ourselves so that we’re more “acceptable” or to fit in better. While it’s often well-meant, I think it also leads to people losing the quirks that make unique and “them”. The older I get, the more comfortable I am with not being so prim and proper. I laugh really loud, like I don’t think I have ever laughed differently in my life. I also have a potty mouth, I feel it really helps me show that I’m a passionate person and get my point across and emphasize whatever is making me happy, angry or sad. I can be impatient, I operate on a “move and think” not “think then move” basis (this may mean that I can be impulsive or that I’m spontaneous, I prefer the latter). And I reserve the right to change and evolve when and however I want to without having to explain myself. Will I apologize if any of the above make someone uncomfortable? Nope.
- Gracefully let go of anything that no longer serves you. By serving you I mean that we should strive to have a life where you have a deep joy and peace about where you’re at despite what is going on around you. This doesn’t happen without an intentional effort and, sometimes, very hard decisions about who and what you allow into your life and space. Making difficult choices, I believe, is often indicative of being brave enough to choose your highest good for yourself (which we always know deep down inside) and that’s how we steer our lives’ path.
- Motivation is short-lived, be deliberate. I don’t know if I’m the exception for once thinking that there are certain things that don’t require real will power to do, like you just love going to the gym or doing your job so much and you’re motivated all the time. LIES. If you’re going to sit around waiting for motivation and passion to come by before doing what you need to do you’ll be waiting a long while boo. Being disciplined and intentional is what gets sh*t done.
- Life does not happen to you, life responds to you. Be very intentional about the energy you exude out into the world. The universe responds to negativity with like circumstances and vice versa.
So about this outfit… this skirt is an oldie, I found it on sale in Mr Price a year ago. I love that it’s gold because you can tone it down and pair it with sneakers like I’m doing here or dress it up with a pair of heels for a night out. And then my white Converse sneakers, these are the BEST thing I own right now. I’m getting a loooot of wear out of these, I have to stop myself sometimes. So yeah, happy birthday to me!!!!
P.S. Please excuse the blur in some of the pictures, we’re still trying to get the hang of this.
Thanks for popping by.
Off-shoulder top – Legit | Pleated skirt – Mr. Price | Cross-body bag – Foschini | Sneakers – Converse All Stars | Earrings – The Fix